I like to explore and stuff...

I'm sitting at home not moving, because my bud and I at 11:30 at night on Friday decided to go hike a giant mountain at 5 am. So I am VERY sore, and can't move around very well, so I decided to write this blog.

    While hiking that treacherous mountain, I was thinking about all of my life expeditions and all the places I've been blessed to be on and go. This last year has been the hardest year of my life to this point. Ever since I broke and tore my foot my Sr year of high school, my life has changed dramatically. And in those changing times, ive felt lost more times than not. Often I wouldn't know where I was going, where I wanted to go, how I would get there or even where I was and what I could offer to this world. When I was in American literature this last fall semester, we read Emerson, Thoreau, Whitman, London and all sorts of other authors that write about exploring and finding yourself. I have always been one to adventure and find out where things go and how stuff works( I mean-- my friend Jake and I went to Louisiana a few days after graduating high school, simply because ... Why not! ) I've been to so many incredible places throughout my life because of baseball and various things, because of that I think I have a rare condition called..... Wanderlust.. A rare condition that makes you lust for adventure, never being still and exploring new places to find yourself in ( that and ADHD haha).  while in a state of wanderlust, I read Walden by H.D Thoreau and in it, he writes about living in the wilderness, why he lives there, and a lot about being self reliant. I kinda took to heart the whole "get lost to find yourself" thing. While trying to find myself, I've
Explored a lot, a lot by myself too, because I just don't have time for sketchy people.. I mean last second, then all of the sudden you have to baby sit, family party and do some homework. Its like, I get it... But that's why I've been to a lot of places alone, just me in the cool , crisp mountain air thinking about life.
After a while, I was never really getting answers to anything I wanted to know. While thinking about that, I realized I was slacking in the whole being spiritual game. I wasn't doing anything bad, I just wasn't being as good as I should. And by that I mean, would pretty much only go to sacrament, because there was always some good mlb, NBA, college or NFL game on to watch. Then one weekend I was home from school, and was cleaning my room, and I found this picture that has been in my room for as long as I can remember. It was a picture of Jesus and the caption was "Find me first, and then you will find yourself " this hit me like ... Really hard, and made me realize I was trying to get answers the wrong way. It helped remind me, that as independent and self reliant as I think I am, I can't accomplish the things I want to without the lords help.

"If Baseball is just a game, then the Grand Canyon is just a hole in the ground."

With Presidents day nearing, I've been thinking about what I have done the past presidents day's, and most every single one of them have ended up in St. George playing baseball. Thinking back on that, got me looking back at my entire baseball career, and how baseball has affected who I am today.

     I started playing baseball (well… T ball) around 3 or 4, and pretty much played every single day until I was a Sr in High School. I was always very blessed with such great teammates, coaches and especially parents, who have supported me my whole life with what every crazy idea that would pop into my head! When I was about 8, was when my baseball career started to take flight. From 8 years old, to 18, I played with the same kids! well, Minus a few here and there! I remember everybody  on my teams and and pretty good friends with all of them, to this day. Starting from when we were 8 , we always had great skill and competitiveness for the game. That, along with  having INCREDIBLE coaches that spent countless hours upon hours with us so that we could be the best that we could be. Again, around 8, our Taylorsville little league team that won state our first year together, decided to make a "Super League" traveling team called the TUFF COUNTRY PREDATORS! To say the least… we were really really good. I can recall the few games we lost, and who we played, what field we were playing on, what position I was playing….. With this Predator team, I was able to travel around the US for various tournaments, and some of those were: St George( countless times), Vegas for Legion Regionals, Cooperstown NY when we were 12, Omaha during the college world series, steamboat springs, phoenix, california… to name some! The Predators were together until our last tournament when we were 14 in Omaha. The majority of that Predators team continued to play together at Taylorsville high school, but a few moved and switched schools. 

   I can ramble on for literally days about my baseball days…. but Im writing this to not talk about my past, but how it has shaped who I am now…. As many of yall know, baseball is "Game of Failure" you are highly praised if you succeed in hitting the ball 3 out of 10 times… You are always practicing so hard for when it is your chance, you might not get the ball hit to you every time, but when it is coming your way, you better be ready for it! Baseball has made me learn to have a quick memory, to not focus on the past failures, but to always practice and play harder for the successful times. I have learned to stay committed to a cause, even when thats the last thing on this earth that you would want to to, still keep your focus on the bigger goal and not the present time when everything seems to be at its worst. It has taught me to work with a team, and how an individual may be very important, but no one is successful unless you work together. Baseball has taught me to think ahead at the possible outcomes that lay ahead and to determine wether to take those risks or not. It has helped me take more chances and if the outcome isn't what I wanted, to not pout about it, but to work harder towards my goals. 

       Baseball has changed my life, and it just took not being able to play, to realize how much I love it! There are so many life skills and values that this game teaches you. Like the Incredible John Wayne said “Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” Don't be afraid to fail, because the only way you can truly fail, is when you give up! I miss playing everyday, but I love to watch my little brother, cousins and old teammates play!

I'd play the victim, but I only have myself to blame.

As we all know, life can take us on a roller coaster ride of emotion. Any day could turn out to be one of the best days of your life, where everything is going extremely well! You wake up on time, you go to class and actually understand the subject matter that was presented, then you take a nap with no interruptions, to then wake up, drink Mtn Dew and make a dinner of elk steak, then play a basketball game and play somewhat decent to then getting to hangout with this extremely cool and beautiful girl you've been to scared to talk to, since like the 2nd week of school. Thats a good day to me! But often times than not, the stars do not line up like that, and you end up waking up late for math, showing up late and having NO idea what you are doing. Then you continue to go to your classes, and continue to get even more confused with how cellular respiration works, how ATP is made, and how inverse functions mean anything to the real world. Then you go to your apt and find out you ate all of your microwavable meals, and you don't have a can opener, and no money to go to 1 of the 3 places to eat in this town. and get…( okay, you get the point) sometimes life can suck! But most everyday, I make things, about…… 100,000 x more difficult or confusing than they need to be! Its amazing, how for a lot of things, I couldn't care less about. Then somethings I care WAY to much about, and it seriously can ruin my day, even week sometimes! Good nit! During college football season, Pretty much all of my small attention span, is used to concentrate  on everything that involves LSU.
    To say the least, "we" as Humans, often times take things for granted and disregard things that aren't important to us, but could be the most important thing to someone else. Like giving old/ not very used items of clothing to friends or to strangers at the DI, that are not in as good of situations as us. Giving a ride to someone that is walking across our frozen tundra of a campus, so that they aren't almost getting frost bite by the time they get to class.
       We can always do more for others, and I know that when I help others more than myself, I feel a lot better about who I am, and how life is going. Trust me, its not easy at all to serve others more than yourself, but when you do, you feel more at peace and more positive and happy…Don't  take this as, that I think I'm some perfect saint or what ever.. because I feel like I am very selfish and only look to please myself, but when I do go out of my way to help others, my "problems" seem to diminish rapidly.
         So I think we all can do better job of realizing what we have, and not making a big deal of things we don't have.. We all have SO much to offer, we just have to discover where our skills and personalities flourish. I know that I am not good at math, science and most everything that takes place in a class room, I can't be an accountant, business man, or a military man. But I know that I am good at reading and dealing with other people, and with that skill of working with people, combined with my love of history and the outdoors, has made me a good Adventure Guide.

     I guess to wrap up my thoughts, (again) we all have so much to offer, and we should all try to be more positive toward our endeavors and really that we aren't just dust in the wind, that we are not meaningless and we all have a purpose on this earth. Also, We need to realize how much we are blessed with ( I'm really, really bad at this) and we need to put more emphasis on the positives and not so much on the negatives.. The negatives are good ( I know it never seems like it) if we use them right, and learn from them! Quit being your worst enemy and losing the game, before it even starts. And when no body believes in you and life seems to be the darkest, you better believe in yourself.

Into the Wild

With school starting tomorrow, I feel inspired to write a blog about all of the other things I would rather be doing, and those include: eating Boudin till I pass out,  Drinking Tremendous amounts of Mtn Dew, getting a horse and chasing sunsets, getting a snowmobile and riding up some mountain until I run out of gas, then go snowshoeing and survive in the wilderness, or maybe swallowing glass…. what ever the case may be, I still have to go to school this semester to finish up my associate of science, and pre reqs for my outdoor recreation degree at SUU next fall. With that being said, I plan on being in school for the next couple years, to finish my bachelors degree, so I might as well try to make the most of my college experience. When the semester first starts, one of two things happens. You either start off gung-ho and do work at the beginning and go hard for the first couple weeks, until your first exam, then you kinda abandon ship. Or you start off hating class and dreading it for the whole semester.. Well, I think its better to work hard since you are paying for it ( or work harder because your parents are paying for it) either way, someone is paying some serious money for you to attend higher education. Sometimes the semester seems like a major drag, and sometimes it is, but in hind site it is incredibly short! every semester I seem to go to, ends up going by faster than the last one, which went by very fast. Just like in sports practice, it seems like the worst when you have extra conditioning, or weights after practice. studying is in a way just like that, it is absolutely terrible while you are doing it, but when you study or work hard in general, there is never a bad side effect. You might not get to go out with your buds one night, or take a cute gal you've had your eye on for a while, but it'll all work out in the end for the better!

I guess to get back to the title// Into The wild……

last semester I had an American Literature class, in which we read, read and read some more. sometimes awful, but other times great! My favorite times in class were when we got to read thoreau and whitman! These authors painted incredible pictures of life in the Wild, that got my imagination going! during class while we would discuss these topics, my mind was really never in class, but somewhere in an untamed land with no laws and natures justice ruling the land! Somewhere that you didn't have to worry about school, peoples very sensitive feelings, fashion and random peoples drama.. a place where you're animal instincts come in, and you just survive. 

Unless I move to remote Alaska, Canada or Russia thats most likely not going to happen, so I'm going to make the  most out of my situation at hand in O Little town of Ephraim. My degree is going to be in outdoor recreation so not only I can participate in the finer activities of life, but so I can show others what its like to really like to LIVE WILD and experience nature for the better. To not be scared of the wild unknown, but to embrace and harness that inner explorer inside them! To keep the semester from getting to dull, I chose to take a Backpackng and a bowling class! Besides that, I made a goal to at least once a week, to go out and explore!

Well, Ace, Im out of here for now, but remember to make the most out of your situations and LIVE WILD!

New Year won't make you a New Person.

With Christmas being over, there is pretty much only one thing on peoples minds, and that is the most over rated "Holiday" we have, and that is New Years Eve…. To me, New years eve, just is an excuse to behave in what other cases, is socially frowned upon. Lets be honest, when else is it okay to publicly kiss people and get crazy drunk or loud and annoying (Not that I care about loud & annoying, because I am. But thats besides the point) New years is an excuse to do things you wouldn't ever think of doing the other 364 days a year,because for some reason, you can only go out and be adventurous the day before the calendar changes numbers…. 

     New Years resolutions have to be one of the most ridiculous things I have ever hear of…. don't get me wrong, making goals, and committing yourself to be a better person  is awesome. But whats the point of telling others  that your goal is to wake up at 530 and go running every morning, when you have not worked out once this year! (well, for me, 3 years. Oh well haha!)

So to say the least, I don't like New Years Eve.. But I can see how people can.. We use any excuse possible to act out of control and party!

New years eve kisses…… I personally hate, because I despise PDA (and no girls want to kiss me)  But really, get A ROOM! aint nobody wanna see yall smooching on other people! New Years kissing is Almost worse than True *fill in the blank* Night….. Maybe i'm just weird, (which I'm sure is true) but I just think giant public events of affection should be outlawed!             

    For the sake of everyone, before you post a status or something about how you will change the world, make sure you change yourself. You don't need to tell people that you wake up super early to go exercise, or Instagram pictures of how you are eating more healthy….. But if you are going to make your new years resolutions, (because for some reason a new year means a new year) make sure you actually do them, or it'll be like every other year...         

What if life was song lyrics?

So far on Christmas break, the majority of my time has been spent listening to music. I listen to music in the shower in the morning before I head to work, where I mostly listen to my iPod on shuffle the whole day. Drive home and turn on the radio…. Okay, you get it.. I listen to music ALOT. Today I found myself really focusing on the lyrics of the songs, instead of the awesome crazy shredding of Metal, or the cool, calming sounds of country. I was zoned in, on what the songs messages were, and that got my little brain thinking.., "Wow, I wonder what would happen if I really talked to people and expressed myself with those same words? What would happen if I went up to that cute girl that I've been crushing on and spit out some good ole country lyrics?"
Music is one of the biggest parts of my life… Might sound silly, per say. But, music has a way of getting deep down and to the point, strike our feelings like no one, or anything else can. These artists that we listen to, have a deep affect on us, because we can relate with the song. Music can better express our feelings better than we can most times. Sometimes when I listen to a song that I haven't heard in a while, my brain decides to replay pretty much every single memory I have associated with that tune or particular song…. Like when ever I hear Chris browns "Forever" I think of 9th grade promotion, or I hear Atreyu's "Right side of the bed" or Missy Eliots "lose control" I think of when I was 12 years old and my TC Predators team was playing in Cooperstown, NY for a baseball tourney..Luke Bryan's "Country Girl shake it for me" takes me back to the best summer of my life when I was In the great state of Louisiana with my Boy Jake Crump.
Besides bringing up old memories, when you really LISTEN to the music.. (and there is a BIG difference between Listening and hearing) it makes you think, and not only think, but feel certain things… While I was at work today I heard the song "Stay Inspired" by one of my all time favorite bands We Came As Romans!
"Why do we love only when it's convenient to us?
Why do we love only when it's convenient to us?

It is because we don't want to let go
Of the security that a close heart holds?
Or is it the risk of being broken?
Too unbearable to even let the thought surface

There are greater rewards in stepping outside of your own comfort
That there are in never breaking down the walls that you've built

A solely self-sustaining life is surely a hollow one
Why do we love only when it's convenient to us?

Why are we understanding only when it's agreeable?

It is because we don't want to let go
Of the security that a close heart holds?
Or is it the risk of being broken?
Too unbearable to even let the thought surface

There are greater rewards in coexistence
That there are in never breaking down the walls that you've built

A solely self-sustaining life is surely a hollow one
Why do we love only when it's convenient to us?

It's time to take action
It's time to stay inspired
It's time to prove that we aren't all talk
And we're not afraid of the risks"

        If those words don't get you wanting to make peace with your ghosts and enemies, and want to be a better person, then you are really lost.
Besides making you want to better yourself, music can make you want to go out, and have wild adventures, have a grand ole time with your bff's, but can make you want to go out and have some crazy forbidden romance! like the great words of Garth Brooks:
"Hello, Samantha, dear
I hope you're feeling fine
And it won't be long
Until I'm with you all the time
But until then
I'll spend my money
Up right down to my last dime
Callin' Baton Rouge!"
    In conclusion, we can't get away with actually communicating with people the same way people in songs do, but we can always play that person the song, because the music expressed that feeling better than we could ever explain it! Well, hope yall can get as much from music as I do!

How Finals are for me...

With it being finals week, i decided i would take some quality time away from studying, and talk to y'all about  finals.
Finals week. The most scary stories in the world are brought to us, from this. Wither it be losing some giant assignment, having your computer crash at 6 am the day of when your final 10 page essay is due, having to redo every single assignment you have done the whole year up to that point, sleeping in and missing a final, because you forgot what day it was, because all you have been doing in studying and eating and barley seeing the outside light, or having THEE entire semester to do an assignment, but getting to it the morning before you have to turn it in.  We all have our own finals nightmare stories, or at least have heard of them from our friends. But are finals really THAT bad?? I have a bittersweet relationship with finals, because yes it sucks having the biggest assignments/ projects and tests all due at once from all of your classes, but you also have a week of pretty much not doing anything! Take monday for example. I was able to sleep in till about 12, then get up and study the freak out of some math, for my test that day… study all day, go to some review sessions with some other students that are going through the same traumatic experience i am going through. So we bonded because of our genuine hate of mathematics and how our professor is a really nice guy, but is very very extremely smart and awkward. But he can't teach a lick of math, because he knows it, so why shouldn't we??  So we study our little brains off, until they turn to mush. Take the test, actually feel some what confident about it, so i tell myself i deserve a nap! So after walking home and realizing how I actually am an idiot and probably didn't get a single answer right, decide to take a mean nap, to maybe forget how mean the real world really is! So yeah, i guess when I'm stressed ( Which hardly happens, because i usually care a lot less about most everything than anyone! Unless it has to to with LSU sports, then I get real rilled up!) I take naps, but i mostly take naps everyday, just i told myself this is a special nap because I worked so hard to get that mentally tired!
So what I've come to conclude is, that finals week is actually pretty good! Because it actually tests what you know. Imagine you are on a sports team, and you always practiced, but never got to play. Kinda sucks right?? Well, to me, big tests actually make sense to study really hard, to prove you actually know something! That and if you don't have a final that day, you get the whole day to study and actually hangout and do somethings you normally wouldn't! For example, today I didn't have any finals and Dallen, Clark and I made a good roomie dinner of tacos, with ground beef, chile, corn and katchup. because we didn't have any taco sauce… I know it is just tacos, but it meant a lot to us, because we never had any sit down meals with our roomies the whole semester, because everyone is doing their own thing and no one has time to make a nice meal!
Finals week is very bitter sweet, because you find out how amazing us college students really are! I mean who else in the world, ( besides The Rainman) can learn an ENTIRE semesters worth of material in ONE night!?? so the massive amounts of studying sucks, but you also have a few off days to do various activities you never  got to during the semester, or you can literally do nothing and write a blog about finals at 130 in the morning, because you know you can sleep the whole day tomorrow if you so please!
With regards to finals……… use my second rule….. DO WORK!!!